Family Roots

I very rarely go to my home town. If you knew where I'm from, you'd understand why, but I don't want to say right now. Let's just say the bus ride involves a מחיצה. Tons of fun. So the rare times that I do go home, there are all those people in shul who are so excited and surprised to see me b/c they remember me when I was thiiiis big. And then there are the others who have no idea who I am. I met one of those women a few years ago on Tisha B'Av in shul. She was so friendly, asking me where I'm from, whom I'm visiting, the usual friendly "you must be new here" questions. So I told her my parents live here and she said "oooh you're "Sheila's" daughter....and your sister is getting married soon, right?" Yup. Then she said to me "You don't look like them at all. You don't have that red hair". So I giggled a little and simply said back, "That's ok, neither do they".

Another fun office game

After that last super fab office game, how could I stop? I played a game this morning where I asked people in my office to guess what time I went to sleep last night. (It is just that boring here right now.) Everyone I asked guessed "you didn't." Do you have so little faith in my ability to get sleep? Well you're right b/c I usually don't get any sleep. But last night I went to sleep at 9:45 p.m. - not a.m. And that was only b/c I had to make a phone call. Otherwise it would have been earlier. So there, all you non-believers!

I am always right!

I was reading a friend's blog the other day. He was talking about how he often reacts incorrectly to things, like laughing while everyone else is crying. I said to him that he shouldn't worry so much because I always react "inappropriately" to things. For example, I loved my bubby more than anyone loved anyone. I cried sooooo much at her funeral. but when my bubby died almost 11 years ago, my reaction - which was not quiet or under my breath or anything - was something like "well there goes my main source of income!" (b/c she would give me money whenever she could - birthday, chanukah, afikomen, she would even invent reasons to give me money....it's march 22nd, here's some money...) It really can't get much more inappropriate than that, ya know... and I was in 11th grade - i.e. old enough to know not say stupid things like that.

I'm going to try to say this in a way that makes sense, but I'm very tired so try and keep up. I feel like people give too much credit to how "everyone else" does something and if "everyone else" is doing it, it's ok but if no one else is doing it, it's bad. Here's an example. If you are in shul and everyone is talking during davening, then according to this logic, it's ok to talk and if you try to shush ppl, you get evil stares. Conversely, if you go into a silent shul where no one talks and you talk, you also get evil stares.
If you're in the noisy shul, but you think people should not be talking, tell them to shush! Don't be embarrassed just b/c you're the only one who feels a certain way in a crowd full of people. Stand up for waht you believe. And also, you never know who else might agree with you but might also be too embarrassed to express it and you might be helping that person.

I'm not advocating talking during davening... What I'm trying to say is that I don't think we should give "everyone" so much credit. Just b/c "everyone" is doing something a certain way, or reacting a certain way, doesn't make it right - or wrong. Sometimes, yes you should conform to what "everyone else" is doing.....like if you go to England where everyone drives on the left, I don't think that is the right place to be different....b/c then you'll be splatted. But other times, it's ok to be different. I told this friend and I'm saying to all of "you". I don't think there's any right or wrong way to do stuff and to react to stuff and to live YOUR life. And you should Never let anyone tell you - verbally or passively or any other way - that what you are doing or wearing or saying or being is wrong. It sucks when you let other ppl govern your actions. It makes you into a victim and I know people who love to be the victim. They are either sad, depressed or angry, and always blaming others. Wanna know what keeps them stuck? They are so afraid of using their own power, that they don't make things happen. So, will you use your personal power?!
You are You and don't let anyone else tell you how that is supposed go.

Time for a coffee break

Someone called me about 8:45 am and I guess I sounded tired - i.e. like I normally sound - froggy throat and all - and the way he was talking, it was like he called my personal phone. "Did I call too early?" I said no. Then he said "I think it's time for coffee". So I laughed and transfered him to the correct person. But OMG! Did you think I sleep at work? Wait a minute......hmm.....

Don't Dew It

You know when you wanna do something that you know you probably shouldn't do, and you try to do it anyways, and you get hurt each time you try? Like when you have a bottle of Mountain Dew in a cabinet and you know you should stop drinking it b/c over the past couple of weeks, you have been drinking a lot of mountain dew. By a lot, I mean bottles and bottles. And you knwo it's bad for you and you should be drinking water but you reeeeeally need the caffiene and they just don't make caffinated water - which they totally should! But you try to get the bottle out of the cabinet to drink some soda and the cabinet door is closing and you reach to catch the door and it slams on your finger and now your finger really hurts and you put it in ice cold water to prevent any bad swelling or anythign and now it hurts more b/c of the coldness. And then you have this cup of water on your desk that you totally forgot you just stuck your throbbing finger in, and you're still thirsty b/c you did not get your soda, so you drink the water.
You know what that's like? Yeah, me either.

השבת אבדה

I think I might have lost my mind. It looks like fried mush. If anyone has seen it, please let me know. Thanx so much.

Survival tip #212

If you use a headset that is attached to the phone base, take the headset off your head before you get up and walk away. It will hurt a lot less and no one will laugh at you.

Who's There?

Ok the last joke God played on me was funny and I was laughing at it...hahahaha.... This new joke He is playing on me is just mean. Just plain mean. Maybe it's a כפרה for something?

*If you would like to hear about the mean jokes God keeps playing on me, inquire within (aronamichal at gmail dot com.) I can't really publish them here.